EPA Warns Human Beings No Longer Biodegradable

I couldn’t resist posting this article, which is both funny and disturbing:

img_8888_large.jpg DC—The Environmental Protection Agency issued a bulletin Tuesday warning the bodies of American citizens, with their large concentrations of artificial, synthetic, and often toxic substances, have been reclassified as industrial waste.

“The average human body is now only 35 percent organic,” EPA chief Ralph Johnson said. “Due to changes brought about by modern detergents, silicone implants, and processed cheese food product, it is no longer safe to allow human tissue to come into contact with our nation’s topsoil.”
Read the full article at theonion.com

3 Responses to “EPA Warns Human Beings No Longer Biodegradable”

  1. Meadowlark Says:

    i love the onion (though i got halfway through this before realizing it wasn’t for real!). thanks for posting it, you made me smile.

  2. Jean-Pierre Antonio Says:

    Well, that was a good scare, but since it comes from The Onion, I realiized it was satire. However, perhaps we shouldn’t laugh too much. I’ve read articles in the past that say that everyone living in the Great Lakes region (tens of millions in both Canada and the U.S.) is contaminated by dioxins and all sorts of other non-biodegradable carcinogenic inorganic chemicals. YIKES.

  3. lamarguerite Says:

    So close to reality, I am not even sure I should laugh . . .

    “The Daily Sins of a Green Girl Wannabe”

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